Okay, fine. This is that entry. Yes, I want a wife. I've just been reluctant to use my blog as a personal ad.
Just for the fun of it, however, I'll just make a list of 12 characteristics of a woman who would be so completely qualified that she could show up on my deck one day and we could go get a ring. If you know someone like this (and she's single of course), send her my way.
1. Looks.Obviously, there has to be some physical attraction.
2. Reading. You've done the reading. That is, whatever is important to you, you've done the reading. You say you're a Christian? You've read the NT. You say you're a nurse? You did the reading in school. That is, you're serious about your undertakings in life and have attained a degree of mastery of them, and aren't just drifting by. You are curious-minded and ideas interest you. You respect brainpower in all its forms, whether a mechanic who can diagnose a car problem or a writer who can clarify complex concepts ... but you don't consider yourself an intellectual.
3. Baseball. You love baseball. You understand it's okay to root for the opposing team's pitcher if he's working on a no-hitter and immediately switch sides the moment he gives up a hit. You understand the game is a series of small battles between pitcher and batter, and you understand how that battle works. Here's an easy one: A batter is notoriously impatient at the plate but is a dangerous long threat. The count is 0-2 and the first two pitches were hard inside fastballs, the second of which was nailed 400 feet foul. The next pitch will probably be ...? And the batter will likely ...? Explain your answer. There's no right or wrong answer if you can justify it.
4. Height. You are between 5-2 and 5-10, although if you are proficient in basketball, you can be 6-1, providing you agree to regularly play one-on-one basketball with me.
5. Taste. You have good taste and love things that are well made, but aren't a snob or anything.
6. Apologies. Recognizing women don't tend to apologize first :) .... nonetheless, at least once a year, you are capable of admitting error with no prompting on anyone's part and apologizing first.
7. Sarcasm. You may bust the occasional chop, but it's not your first instinct to cut people down. You understand habitual sarcasm as soul-deadening, witless business and a sign of emotional cowardice. Your sense of humor is rooted in the delightfulness of life, and like whimsy and tolerate occasional silliness (see point 1).
8. Generosity of spirit. You are a loving person and your first instinct is to be charitable to others. You root for others to succeed.
9. Faith. You love God and you're on fire for the Lord. You give thanks and praise daily.
10. Companionship. You prefer the company of people to dogs, cats and plants (btw, no cats and dogs must sleep on the floor). You make a good companion whether on trips or sitting at home, and like to try new things but don't always need to be trying new things. You can be active and you can sit still. You don't freak out in the clutch or at least you can keep it together until a crisis is over.
11. Busyness. You are your own person but you have room for a significant other in your life (and not just a very specific slot for that person to fit in or role to play). You are not a workaholic and you have not filled your life with so many things that you have to schedule dates between plans with others. You respect others' time, feelings and schedules. You are honest about this, not pretending you want a relationship while scheduling your life to ensure you won't have time for one.
12. You are attracted to and like me. Kind of self-explanatory.
Are those reasonable? Did I miss anything?